Reply To: Accepted? Or Tolerated?

Barry Nkosi

Hi.. sorry for the late response. I have been having a brain fog of late because of the lock down. My journey has not been easy with my family.. I suffered a stroke when I seemed to be very healthy  and living a healthy life style. Growing up I was always
that strong willed kid that could overcome anything, beat asthma when I was 9 yrs because I refused not to play sport

Was shot in my hip when I was working part time as bouncer.. I was told I would never walk again.. I refused to accept that and pushed had to be able to walk.. so in a nut shell my sister who became my caregiver  could not understand how this time I seemed
a bit defeated! She would ask me stuff I had no recollection off or speak about my past life and how I was her hero.

This went on to a point were her daughter called me a retard because they saw me as broken man.

I moved out of her home and went back to my apartment and that’s when the warrior in stood up.. though I could not stand physically for a long time.. I stood up on the inside and trained my mind first then my body followed. I trained my self how to get up
when I fall because Ididnt use a  walking add.

Being in that zone was easy because the triggers came from my past athletic life.

By the the time most of my family members saw me again after six month’s they believed that I had a mild stroke and not a major stroke. My will to survive in their eyes is my enemy emotionally. Pre stroke I believe I appeared strong and I was driven sports
and I believed I was a gladiator who lived for the hunt: post stroke I discovered a diffrent version of me.. I discovered who I am… and I found that I am the enemy of my own identity. People who identified with the old me did not like who I had become…
a humanitarian in a league of gladiators.

Growing up I was the guy you went too when people mess with my brothers. It was tough for them to accept that that version of me is gone.  

Sent from my BlackBerry 10 smartphone.

From: Strokefocus Member Services
Sent: Monday 6 July 2020 18:21
Reply To:
Subject: Daniel Gu replied to “Accepted? Or Tolerated?” on Get real: “Barry, welcome to the community! Thanks for speaking up. When you say your family members think “